August 26, 2010

            In one of my classes I have this little 1st grade boy named Max.  Max and his friend Brian are little terrors.  They’re always punching each other in line then crying and telling on the other.  Throwing hundreds of little pieces of eraser across the classroom at each other or eating their pencil or whatever it may be.  They also try to sneak things past me all the time, mostly trying to obscure whatever they are doing with their book or by doing it just below table level of their desks.  The other day Brian was gone so I think Max felt he needed to step up his performance.  He’d already had his pencil taken away after drawing all over his desk.  Later I had taken away Max’s pencil box because he was continually sliding it off the desk onto the floor and at the same time I’d told the rest of the class to start answering questions in their workbook.  This put Max in quite a predicament, on the one hand I’d asked him to answer questions in his book and on the other he had no means in which to do this.  Max, who is very good at finding a way around whatever obstacles I put in his way, found the solution that hadn’t even occurred to me.  Very slowly Max licked his finger, reached down under the table and dipped it in an overscratched mosquito bite on his leg and began writing the answers in his own blood.  The girls in the class started screaming, which was a big surprise to Max who looked up from what he was doing like it was the most normal thing in the world.  I had to turn away momentarily in order not to laugh and encourage him.  I pretended to not be impressed by his ingenuity and quickly gave him a pencil to finish his work but this was not before he had circled two correct answers in blood.


2 Responses to “Max”

  1. Tyler Says:

    I swear, you have the most odd-ball kids to teach!

  2. Claire Says:

    That’s the best story I’ve heard in a while. I want to be friends with Max.

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